10 Ways to Live Without Attachment

It always amuses me how a particular lesson continues to show up in our life until we get it. Sure, it comes in different forms – a physical sign, something we hear, a challenge we confront – but it comes repeatedly.

Lately my lesson is learning how to let go. That might seem like a nebulous idea, but it’s really quite simple: the tighter the grip, the more tension is created. The more tension that lives in our bodies, the more stressed out we are, and stressequals the root of all evil.

Knowing what we want and having zero control over timing can be a struggle. It’s important to learn how to have a dream, wish it well, send it on its way, then get back to living in the here and now. It's like sending a message in a bottle off to sea; yeah, we hope someone finds it and responds, but we aren’t desperate for that to happen and almost forget about it once it hits the tide.

Here are some ways I’ve learned to apply that same breeze to every day life:

1. Figure out what grounds you and do it daily.

I wake up every morning and do the same series of five-minute stretches, drink hot water with lemon, take a shower, do a quick meditation, eat breakfast, then feel ready to brave the day. I like to get a workout in if possible, but if not, this routine still sets me up to be present and productive. Taking this time for myself brings me to a place of balance. From that place I can respond with a calm, secure attitude, continuously moving forward as I confront things that might otherwise stop me in my tracks.

2. Do what you love.

Stop saying yes when you want to say no. Figure out what makes your heart smile. Spend as much time as possible doing that, and trust that you can make a career out of it. This makes uncertainty exciting because there’s a faith that every moment has the potential to bring true joy.

3. Release the ego and say goodbye to self-doubt.

Judgement, comparisons, fears, insecurities, and all the guilty feelings that create pain in our lives stem from the ego. Do not them guide you. Take control of your mind; empower it.

4. Cultivate unshakeable self-love.

Yes, we’re all crazy. Feel better now that that’s out there? We’re also all awesome; own that, because who cares about the rest? Expand on the ways you rock and forget the rest. When you feel good about yourself, you feel good about everything else.

5. Take nothing personally.

We’re all fighting the good fight and doing it the best way we know how. Everyone handles stuff differently. Choose to let things bounce off you, and they will. It’s so much easier this way!

6. Look whatever feeling comes up straight in the face and be OK with it.

Then choose to move forward anyway. Learning to be comfortable with discomfort is a lesson that will last a lifetime. Just take a deep breath and stop trying to analyze it. Feel it, move on.

7. Slow down and pay attention.

When we aren’t filling the time with minutiae there’s a lot of empty space. Which is a good thing. That allows us to tune into the detail and pay attention to the signs. This is where we get little winks from the universe that we’re heading in the right direction. The winks are so fulfilling!

8. Relax.

The majority of our society lives from a place of fear. Get out of your adrenals. It always works out the way it’s supposed to, and it’s all going to be OK.

9. Come from a place of unconditional love.

Don't sweat the small stuff, give and show love every way you can. Happiness is a choice, make that perspective your priority.

10. Practice patience.

Keep your eye on the prize but enjoy the journey. All good things come to those who wait.